Not Getting What You Want from Life?
Ten Reasons Why
We’ve all faced those days when we wonder what’s the point of life? We question our entire existence and why we find ourselves on this planet. More often than not, it’s because we haven’t quite figured out our true purpose. What really makes us tick? What do we really want from life? We wait desperately for that Aha! moment. And then, radio silence.
It is commonplace to feel you aren’t getting what you think you deserve from your life. So then what could be the reason for that?
Here is a list of 10 reasons why life may not be dealing you the cards you’re hoping for.
1. You Don’t Take on Things That Scare You
Achieving extraordinary outcomes does not come from doing ordinary things. Step out of your comfort zone and just try whatever it is you want to do. You don’t need to be an expert. You just have to believe.
If you want to be an entrepreneur, start a business or even just a side hustle.
If you want to be a techie, learn to code.
If you want to be a public speaker, speak at a local event.
It seems like common sense but if you don’t get off the couch and go try whatever it is that interests you, you won’t get anywhere. An audience of only one? Perfect. That’s enough to get started.
2. You’re Focused on What You Want Now vs. What You Can Achieve in the Long Term
Say you really want to be a successful author but it will take a long time to get there so you’d rather just stay in a job you don’t like so you can have the money and title associated with that. You’re focused on what you can have today instead of making sacrifices to have the future you want tomorrow.
As my mother would say, you can’t have your cake and eat it too.
3. You Worry About Other People’s Opinions
This is a perfect way of getting in your way. Often times it is hearsay, whereby you believe someone thinks “x” of you when they actually haven’t said anything. Or they don’t always agree you but only you can understand your decisions. You have to do what matters to you. Don’t worry about what other people think. Chances are they’re stuck in a hole because they’re too worried what others might think as well!
4. FOMO — Fear of Missing Out if You Take an Alternative Path
Perhaps you want to quit your job to start your own business but you’re one month away from a potential promotion. You are afraid that if you leave you may never get that promotion or title again. This is FOMO. And of course, opportunities will always be waiting for you. You could actually be missing out on being a first mover in a completely new business.
5. You Give Up Before You Even Try
Results take time and a whole bucket load of patience. You hope to find success on Medium but write one article and see no audience and give up. Some of the most successful writers here started exactly where you are. They toiled and toiled, wrote virtually for themselves till they perfected their voice and found their audience.
The difference between those that succeed and those that don’t are simply the ones that didn’t stop.
6. You’re in Love with the Results not the Actual Work
Put in other words, you value the destination more than the journey. You’re in love with the idea of being a “New York Times Bestselling Author” but you don’t actually want to do the years of work, tireless edits and revisions.
The reality is an author would love to just cosy up in front of their laptop and write all day. It’s the passion for what they do that makes them successful not the passion for the results. Stop looking for short cuts.
JK Rowling is a billionaire, she could be sipping piña coladas in the Bahamas all day everyday but she is still a devout writer. It’s her raison d’être.
7. You Lack a Strong Support System
Taking on challenges requires mentorship, community and strong relationships. You can’t do this alone. If you aspire to be a scientist, reach out to some local science focus groups. Don’t be shy to ask. Ask questions. Make yourself known. Make new connections. You don’t look silly for speaking up, in fact you are brave.
8. You’re Not Consistent
Can you challenge yourself to commit to doing something everyday? If you want to speak Spanish can you set aside 30 minutes a day to learning the language? Can you do it everyday even when you don’t want to?
Consistent behaviours become habits. Habits make us who we are without consciously trying too hard. Automating these behaviours will cultivate success. You don’t have to move to Spain and live in a villa lined with bougainvillea trees to speak Spanish.
9. You Don’t Know What You Want
Just figuring out what you want from life is hard work. Have you written your values? Understood your beliefs? Found patterns in what you enjoy doing? Explored a career path for yourself? Or maybe you want to just be a really good parent? These are all questions that only you can answer. It requires commitment to figure out. You can only put in the work to manifest the life you want once you know where you are going.
10. And if you still don’t know why?
It’s because you’re simply not ready yet.
You will grow further as you face more obstacles, which will prepare you for the future that lies in store for you. Keep on building your grit and stamina.
If you’re not making excuses and falling victim to the 10 reasons above, you’re sure to find exactly what you want from your life.
